Out Of The Dark
by Ephainygrey
Summary: It has been six years since we waked the halls of Hollywood Art. We were the kings and queens of one of the most sought after performance arts high schools in the country. That was six long years ago and so much has changed.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N This is a short chapter just to give you what is to come. This will be a dark but somewhat humorous fic. I well post chapter two as well just so you have more. I am working on chapter three and hope to have posted by the end of the weekend.  
>I do not own Victorious or receive any money for the writings done on this site.<strong>

**Circle the Drain**

It has been six years since we waked the halls of Hollywood Arts. We were the kings and queens of one of the most sought after performance arts high schools in the country. That was six long years ago, and so much has changed. Cat and Beck moved to take New York on by storm and haven't stopped since. Cat, with her ever growing music career, and Beck has taken Broadway on with a vengeance and is making it his. Robbie has moved to London where he is top dog at the BBC. Andre has taken on the West Coast music business like it was made for him.

Then there is me lying awake late in the bedroom that had become cold and lonely with every minute that she is gone. The home we made together is like an empty tomb of sadness and anger.

The looks she gives me, with those empty eyes. Those eyes, that once had been so bright and full of life, have become dark and dead. At one time she would have done anything, for anyone. She was so nice and caring. I had fallen in love with her almost from the first time I saw her, but now, she is gone. All that is left behind is the cold hearted vessel of the person she was before.

We are left with the bitterly angry, cold person that had once made my days brighter and my nights louder with passion, which she would show with every touch of my body. Now I watch the woman that I love wash that passion away with every drink. I lose her even more with every push of the needle into her arm. I just want to take away the demons that make her turn from me to the drugs that she thinks makes her better. I was supposed to be her only drug; my love was all the high she was supposed to need. Not the pills she takes, that she washes down with booze. I was supposed to be all she ever needed, but now she runs from me to the white powder in a baggie and a spoon.

I know every time she tells me that she loves me more than life itself, she is not really pledging to me, but the idea of the next time she can tie her arm off and fill herself with that false love that she pumps in to her veins.

She stood with me in front of all of our friends and family and told me that she will love me through the good and bad, richer and poorer, until death do us part. Only to bring her own death closer every day.

At first I could still see glimpses of My Tori in the mess that stood in front of me, but now I can see that My Tori has died, and she left the body of an alcoholic drug abuser to take her place. I have always thought if I could just get her help, but it never worked. She would be dry and clean for a few months and then she would have to go back out on the road and it would start all over again. I would beat my head against the wall trying to find a way to help her stay clean, but then I realized that I can't help someone that doesn't want help, so I had to watch her slowly kill herself. I want to walk away, but I can't. From high school to now, it has always been Jade and Tori. But now it's just me. Tori is no longer mine, she belongs to the drugs.

It's not a question of if I will ever be enough for her again. The question is, why was I not enough for her to begin with? I lie awake, hoping for an answer, only to get silence and the feel of heartbreak. Knowing that only a few feet away, in the other room, is a little girl lying awake in her bed, wondering if her mommy was ever coming home. I feel the heartache knowing that our daughter cries herself to sleep calling for her mommy that will never call back.

Tori will never be the loving, caring mother she once was. My heart cracks into two every time I rub my baby bump, knowing that this child will never know the woman that brought so much light to my life. He will only know the dark hate that lives in her body now.

I waited all night for her, but she never came home. I wake our daughter up and get her ready. We grab the bags that are filled with our lives and we walk out of the house that was supposed to be our happy home. I left Tori behind. I left with our children, because we just can't watch Tori circle the drain anymore. I took the love I once had with me in my heart and left the heartbreak behind to raise my family alone. "I love you, Tori, but I can't be your fucking mother. And I can't circle the drain with you any longer," I said as I closed the door to our now broken home.


	2. Bring me to life

**Chapter 2**

**Bring me to life**

I left Tori nine months ago and never heard a word from her. She never tried to find me or our daughter. She wasn't there for the birth of our son. I have been living alone with my two children in our new home. It is a place that is full of life and happiness. There are times where I lie awake at night and wonder what happened to Tori. I find myself wondering if she is even still alive. After we left, she disappeared; no one knows where she is. She stopped touring and making music. I feel the tears fall when I think that she may have lost her battle with her demons, and they won the war she had fought so hard against in the beginning.

I lay quiet in my room and listen to the faint cries coming from my daughter's room, as she cries for the mother she will never see again. I become teary eyed when I hear my daughter sing. She looks just like her before the demons came to take her away from us.

Our daughter Catherine was named by our best friend Cat, who had moved to New York to follow her own singing career. She told us that now there will always be a Cat in LA.

I only see Cat once in a while, when she is touring on the west coast. She makes sure she can have time with her old friends. Her and Beck live together in New York and are back for the holiday season with their families. Even so, they made time to hang out with the rest of the old gang.

Trina and her husband had returned home, and Trina has made time to come out with us. I had often wondered if she blamed me for Tori's choices in life. Mr. and Mrs. Vega are watching the kids so I can join the gang at Karaoke Dokie.

My friends thought I needed time away from my life for a night. We all walked into the club that I have not been in since the night the Tori had made a scene in one of her drunken moods.

We found a table close to the stage, and the owner, to our amazement, was Hayley, who gave us all a hug in greeting. "I'm so glad that you all have come back after all these years!" she bubbled as she moved us from our table to a VIP table on a balcony overlooking the stage. "I only let the best use this table, and so far, you are the first. I will send you a waitress to take your order. You will be her only table." Hayley quickly turned, calling for a young girl to take our orders.

"Well, at least we don't have to have another sing off with her," Andre said, before telling his new wife about the night Cat, Tori, and me had pulled one over on her, and Tori sang Freak the Freak Out to win the bet.

"Yeah, but you didn't have to deal with them afterwards. I, of course, made it worse for them. By the time they came over, I could have taken care of myself. After they came in the house, I thought 'What would Jade do?' And I made their night a living hell." She smiled at me with a sad look in her eyes. I know she missed Tori very much. "Sorry, Jade. This is supposed to be a fun night, not a night of bad memories." She took my hand and I could see the tears threating to fall.

After we got our order, the lights died down as someone took the stage. The music was not what you would expect to hear here. It definitely was not that upbeat pop stuff that Tori was famous for.

'_**How can you see into my eyes, like open doors**_

_**Leading you down into my core**_

_**Where I've become so numb, without a soul**_

_**My spirit's sleeping somewhere cold**_

_**Until you find it there and lead it back home'**_

I looked at Beck, who was watching the stage with wide eyes. I closed my eyes. I knew that voice, and I wanted it to be true. But I was scared to look. I opened my eyes when I heard a guy's voice.

'_**(Wake me up,) **_

_**wake me up inside **_

_**(I can't wake up,)**_

_**Wake me up inside, **_

_**(save me,)**_

_**Call my name and save me from the dark, **_

_**(wake me up)**_

_**Bid my blood to run,**_

_**( I can't wake up)**_

_**Before I come undone,**_

_**( save me)**_

_**Save me from the nothing I've become**_

There she was, on the stage with some guy. I had to do a double take. She didn't look like My Tori. But she didn't look like that monster that she had become, either. She moved closer to the guy and sang with sadness and anger. The passion she sang with, I haven't seen in a long time. It sounded like the old Tori.

'_**Now that I know what I'm without**_

_**You can't just leave me**_

_**Breathe into me and make me real, bring me to life'**_

''_**(Wake me up,) **_

_**wake me up inside **_

_**(I can't wake up,)**_

_**Wake me up inside, **_

_**(save me,)**_

_**Call my name and save me from the dark, **_

_**(wake me up)**_

_**Bid my blood to run,**_

_**( I can't wake up)**_

_**Before I come undone,**_

_**( save me)**_

_**Save me from the nothing I've become**_

She looked out over the crowd, like she was searching for someone. Her eyes finally looked up to us, and our eyes locked. Part of me wanted to run to the stage and take her back from him. Hold her like she was still mine.

'_**Frozen inside without your touch**_

_**Without your love, darling**_

_**Only you are the life among the dead**_

_**(All this time, I can't believe I couldn't see**_

_**Kept in the dark, but you were there in front of me' **_

'_**I've been sleeping a thousand years it seems)**_

_**I've got to open my eyes to everything**_

_**(Without a thought, without a voice, without a soul)**_

_**Don't let me die here**_

_**(There must be something wrong,)**_

_**bring me to life**_

'_**(Wake me up,) **_

_**Wake me up inside **_

_**(I can't wake up,)**_

_**Wake me up inside, **_

_**(save me,)**_

_**Call my name and save me from the dark, **_

_**(wake me up)**_

_**Bid my blood to run,**_

_**( I can't wake up)**_

_**Before I come undone,**_

_**( save me)**_

_**Save me from the nothing I've become Bring me to life, I've been living a lie, there's nothing inside**_

_**Bring me to life' **_

They finished the song and she looked back to me one last time, before throwing the microphone to the stage and walked off with such attitude.

Looking around to the rest of the table, I could tell that my friends had no idea that she would be here.

"Jade, are you okay?" Cat murmured, and reached for me. I gently but firmly brushed her hand away from my shoulder.

"No, Kitty, I'm not." Taking her hand, I locked eyes with her, but talked to everyone at the table. "D-Do I go after her?" I stuttered with emotion.

"I don't think you have to babe," Beck said, pointing to the opening of the balcony. There stood the woman that I had once loved with all my heart and soul. I looked her up and down, taking in the woman standing before me.

She still had her long hair, but it looked healthy again. And it was black, a surprising change for so subtle a difference. She was dressed in black, too. Her shirt was tight fitting, long sleeved. Gone were the skinny jeans, in their place was black leather pants with a silver studded belt. She had black biker boots that were opened at the top and folded over. Behind her was the guy she had sang with. He stood close to her with a protective stance, and watched us over her shoulder.

"So, how have you all been?" she asked, like she was joining us for lunch on a Monday afternoon back in school. While she waited for us to answer, she leaned back into the guy behind her.

"Where have you been?" Trina cried out as she stood up, going to her sister. "How dare you just show up, after all this time? We all thought you were dead! That you had killed yourself with all the drugs and booze!" Trina was openly torn between slapping Tori or hugging her.

"Yeah. Those were not my finest times. I hope you're all well," she looked around, like she was getting bored.

"I guess you are going to want to see the kids," Trina said, looking at me to see if I was going to say anything at all.

"Why would I do that?" she asked in a bored tone. I felt tears come to my eyes at her attitude about our children. Didn't she care how they are?

"Don't you care?" Cat snapped, trying to stand up, but Beck wouldn't let her. Cat had asked the question I couldn't. She reacted in the way I couldn't.

Tori watched the way Beck had held her and I saw that twinkle that would gave me just a little hope. "Yes I care but I can't see them now." She pushed the guys hand off her shoulder throwing him a dirty look.

"I can't do this." I moved to leave but Andre who sat on one side of me took my arm and sat me back down. "No Andre I have get out of here." I pulled my arm away and tried again this time Beck joined in with holding me in place from the other side.

Tori watch as the guys held me in my seat. She watched as they tried to calm me down but I couldn't hold back the tears anymore. I looked down as she walked away from me again. Looking as close to her boots as I could as she made her way to the stairs I could see little scissors embroidered into the overturned tops of her boots. I followed her leaving the club with my eyes and then fell into Andre's arms as I watch Tori walk out of my life again. "She's gone." I cried into his shoulder.

As I gained some composure I reached down and took my bag. "Thank you. I have to go. Trina do you think your mom and dad would watch the kids until tomorrow?" I asked her with tears still rolling down my cheeks.

"Yeah they have mine too. I'm sure they love having all the grand kids in one house." She stood up to let Andre out of my way.

I walked to the stairs then turned back looking at them. "I just want my Tori back." Then I walked down the stairs.

Monday morning, I got Catherine ready for school and Blade ready for daycare. I was off to the studio for filming. I am not yet the big time director I wanted to be, but I am definitely paying my dues. I am the first assistant director on a major motion picture. So this means I get to do everything the director doesn't want to do, or does not have time to get done. I put in a lot of hours here and I am so grateful for Mrs. Vega. She picks the kids up from school and daycare and keeps them until I get done here. I have never kept the kids from them, even after I left their daughter. I was surprised that they understood me leaving. They both had told me that I had stayed longer than anyone else would have, including themselves. They love Tori with all their hearts, she's their daughter, but there is just so much a person can take. And watching Tori run that path for so long, they just couldn't take anymore. They were both willing to help me get back on my feet and help with the kids. When I first told them that I had left Tori, they both cried, knowing that I was her last crutch, and that they may never see her again.

As I was driving to work, the producer called and told me that there had been changes to the script and crew. I was nervous. I didn't know if I was going to have a job after I got to the lot. Driving up to the gate, I was checked off on the guards clip board and waved through. This was a good sign that I was not fired. At least, not yet, anyway.

I walked on set to see the producer stalking up to me with fire in his eyes. I stood there, trying to bring the old Jade out, but it didn't work. He threw his arms up in the air and started yelling. "Mother. Fucking. Director! Walked out on us, taking our leading lady with him. I have a new leading lady, but no fucking director. So it's up to you, Jade, until we can find a new one. You're running the show, so get the fuck to work." He whirled away and stomped off toward the exit, where the extras were streaming in for the day.

I was scared that I was fired, and now I'm scared that I won't do my job right! I think I have given myself the world biggest sphincter pucker known to man. I went to meet the new leading lady, and there stood Tori, with that guy. I feel myself start to sweat, which never happens, and I do believe my asshole has just concaved into itself. I acted like I didn't see her. That was after I stood in front of her, staring. I walked over to the crafts service table to get me some coffee, which I don't need, because after today, my ass will so tight I won't shit for a month. I do believe I could shove a piece a coal up my ass and get a diamond in ten minutes. Turning around, I run right into Tori. "Jade, are you okay?" she asked, the concern in her voice sounding genuine to my ear.

"I just became the director on this movie, and the new leading lady is you. How the fuck do you think I am? I'm going to need a colonoscopy to find my courage to go on." I stare at her, like I was expecting her do anything else besides laugh. Which, of course, she did. Right in my face. "How the hell did you get this job?" I didn't want to sound mean or disbelieving that she could do this movie. I just didn't want to have to deal with a Lindsey Lohan actress wanting to be doped up all the time. I felt like things could one of two ways; we get along and the movie turns out great, or we fight all the time like Liz and Dick and still get a great movie. Something tells me it's going to be the latter, because here comes that guy again!

I started to walk off when I hear him ask her if she was alright. Why wouldn't she be alright? She wasn't the one lying awake every night, listening to our daughter cry her eyes out, wanting her mother. She isn't the one having to raise two kids on her own, while holding down a full time job and going to school online at night. She was the one who thought partying and pumping everything under the sun into her arm was a great idea. So, yes, Tori should be just fine. Thanks for asking, dick.

I walked over to where the crew was gathered, letting them know that I was taking over and that I was ready to get started. "Okay, let's get started. Call places, please." The call was made and the actors made their way to the set. "Quiet on the set!" As the bell rang, I looked into the monitor. Tori stood waiting for me to call action. "Light. Playback. Action!" I yelled, and watched as she hit every line, every mark. She seemed to be very focused on her acting, and through the monitor I saw it. I saw the old Tori. Her passion, wit, and grace that she had had before she got lost. Her leading man, on the other hand, sucked whale penis. If we were going to make a great movie, Tori was going to have to carry him, because we can't get a new leading man this late in the game. "Cut!" I yelled, walking onto the set. "Tori, you were great. Very focused and on point. Bruce, please take the time over lunch to learn your lines, and possibly take an acting class." After talking to the actors, I walked back to my chair. I started looking over the film clipboard and I noticed that guy walk back up to Tori. "Seth, run sound," I told my sound guy and pointed to my headset. I listened in to what they were talking about on the set.

"Tori, are you okay?" he asked her. I'll give him this, he did project caring. About my wife.

"Yes, but I feel a little out of place. What do I do?" What? Why would she be asking him that? And who the hell is this twit?

"Just breathe. And remember to count and focus." Right, so she can fuck up her lines, because she is focused on counting. This guy has to go. I don't want him on the set, distracting my actors.

"Seth, cut sound. Tori, can you come over here, please?" I asked her. She nodded and trotted over and that little puppy is following her. "I need to talk to you, so can you put your puppy in his kennel, or does he need walking first?" I said, looking at the guy. Tori gave a little giggle before pointing to the wings. We walked off the set to talk, and here he comes! Following us like he is stuck to Tori's umbilical cord. "Tori, please. I want to talk to you without your tumor hanging around."

"I can't do that, Dave," Tori said in a very even voice, and I do believe my brain has fallen through my body, and is now stuck in my closed up ass.

"The hell are you talking about?" Please tell me that she is being funny, because I can't handle split personalities today. "Are you Dave?" I ask the guy who is now laughing at me.

"No, Jade, this is Michael. He is my drug sponsor," Tori laughed with him.

"Then who's Dave?" Then it hits me. She was quoting Stanley Kubrik's 2001: A Space Odyssey. Well, if I don't look like the dumbest person alive. I shake my head and blow out an exasperated sigh. "Okay, so the Odyssey aside, we need to get back to work, and if you could stay close Mike, but not in the way, that would be great." I want this to work for her this time. I want my Tori back. And if I have to put up with Mike, then so be it. As long as Tori comes out of this on top.

**A/N I hope you liked this and hope to receive reviews. I have been working on the sequel to Last Kiss and hope to have it ready to be posted after the New Year.**


	3. Drive

**Chapter 3**

**Drive**

Filming was hard and long, mostly because Bruce couldn't get his lines right and won't stop messing around. This guy is a one of the worst actors I have seen since school. Because of him, we are over time and that could make us over budget. I can't use most of his work when he is by himself and Tori has to work that much harder to carry him.

I am watching the dailies, and I have to show this shit to the producers tonight. As I'm watching the dailies, I feel myself start to get physically sick from the quality this guy's acting. "He's not even good enough to be in a bad B film. What the fuck?" Mark, my producer, walked in, handing me a cup of coffee. "I have a really bad idea, but I think it might help me work with Bruce," I tell him with a shake of my head, knowing that it's just the worst idea ever, but we may just pull it off.

"If your idea is to kill Bruce, then I'm all for it. I was on set today watching you, and you know your stuff. But Bruce is a tool." Then I hope he will give me the green light to get Beck as an acting consultant. He'd play the soft touch to my iron fist, and maybe we could motivate Bruce into something resembling a real actor.

"I have a friend that I went to school with. He is a great actor." He started to wave his hand in the air, shaking his head no. "Before you cut me off, hear me out. We worked together a lot and I think if we could double team him with the directing and Tori come at him with the acting, then we might just pull this movie off," I tell him, waiting for his answer. I start to feel myself getting all jumpy on the inside, like I swallowed Cat on a sugar high. This was a bad feeling, and an even worse image, of me swallowing my best friend.

"Who is this guy? Not to say a brain dead monkey wouldn't be better than Bruce. He only got this job because the other director was sleeping with him." I really wish I could take my brain out of my head and give it a good shake. Now I have the image of gay brain dead monkeys in a cattle call for a zombie movie. "Jade, are you okay?"

"Yeah, sure." I shake my head to get my mind back on track. "His name is Beck Oliver, and he is one of the best actors on Broadway today. I know he has time off and can help me out. I can have him here in forty-five minutes." The swallowed Cat came rushing out of me at full force. I started jumping up and down clapping my hands. "Oh, and Cat Valentine is here, too! I know I can get her for the soundtrack."

"Cat Valentine would be great for the soundtrack, but we already have Tori Vega doing music," he told me.

"I don't mind sharing with Cat. In fact, I would love to work with her again. I like the idea of you and Beck double teaming him, and I will bring everything I got on set," Tori said from the door. I look over at her and smile. Mike walked up behind Tori, holding his phone in his hand. He lightly pushed past Tori, walking into the room.

"Hey Jade, I have to leave. Scott needed me at home. I was wondering if you could give Tori a ride? She's not allowed to drive anymore." I know I'm looking at him like the brain dead monkeys are back in my head, but I don't know what to say. After an awkward moment, he said with a shrug, "I guess she could call a cab."

"No. We have to get this done, and if Jade can't drive you, then I can take you home," Mark said to Tori.

Mike shook his head slowly and gave Mark a polite smile. "I'm sorry, sir, but I can only allow Tori to go with certain people. Jade had been cleared for rides and visits. It also helps that she's her wife," he said, watching Mark to see if he understood. Mark was a veteran producer, though, and this obviously wasn't his first time around an actor who had fallen. He nodded acceptance while spreading his hands.

"Oh, that's right. You're in the program. Good. Whatever you need us to do, to make things run as smooth as they can, just let me know. Just remember, I'll remember you're in the program now, and I won't stand for any bullshit, understand," he said to Tori. When she nodded in return to him, he shifted his focus to me. "Jade, I like your thinking, so let's try it your way. However, let's set up the meeting for tomorrow. I'm going to call it a night." He waved as he walked out of the screening room.

"I'll call Beck, try to set something up, but then I have to finish these dailies. Mind hanging around?" I asked her. She just gave me a look that I knew so well. No problem then.

After Mark had let the room and we were alone, Mike handed me three cards with different names on them and a lot of phone numbers. "That is my card, and the other two housemates. My life partner and I are her drug and alcohol counselors, and Fran is our house guard. For all intents and purposes, she makes sure that Tori keeps to house rule one: no drugs or alcohol in the house. If you do drop her off, we do need you to come in and meet the other housemates. And when you come over to visit, you will have to sign the visitor book. As for Tori seeing the kids, we ask that she does not for two months, and she is almost there. With that said, we do not allow children in the house, for obvious reasons. If you need to get a hold of me, day or night, please feel free to call for whatever reason. I'm a good listener and you don't have to be an addict for me to listen. Do you have any questions?" he finished, smiling at me.

"A lot of questions. Holy shit, that was a lot to take in. When I drop Tori off, can we talk then?" I asked and Mike smiled, nodding his head. He bid us goodnight, and just like that, Tori and I are here alone. I turned back to the dailies immediately after Mike left. I didn't know what to do. All I ever wanted from the time I left Tori was to have time to talk to her, and now that I have it, I don't know what to say.

We were watching the train wreck that Bruce called acting when I looked down at my watch and saw it was going on eleven-thirty. "Shit, I'm nowhere close to being done. I have to make a phone call." I jumped up, walked into the hall, and called Mr. and Mrs. Vega. "Hi, Holly. How are the kids doing?" I asked.

"They're fine, dear. They have been fed and bathed. Do you need us to put them to bed? How is work going for you today?" She asked me in her happy, motherly tone. I wanted to tell her that Tori was here, but I didn't know if that is something Tori wanted to keep a secret. Which is something that can be held quiet for only so long. The internet is always updating, and Holly, at the least, always followed my film work closely. I finally decide that I'll talk to Tori about it before I tell her parents. I cleared my throat before I finally responded.

"Well, got a promotion today. I'm the head director now. The other one quit, so they had no choice in such a short time but to promote me. So there may be a lot of late nights now, so I'm going to have to start looking for someone else to watch the kids," I tell her.

"No you will not, young lady. David and I will watch them. You don't need to leave them with someone they don't know." I felt the smile creep onto my face. God, I wish my parents were this cool.

"Are you sure that you and David will be okay with this? There will be a lot of late nights and they may have to stay over more."

"Yes. Now don't you worry about anything. We can talk about this when you come see them tomorrow," she said in her motherly tone. I couldn't hold back the giggle as she scolded me.

"Okay. Well, I have to get back to work. I'll talk to you tomorrow when I come to pick up the kids." Holly and I said our goodbyes. I turned back to the screening room, running in to Tori who was standing in the doorway. "Sorry." I stepped back, looking at her and I got the feeling that she was about to embark on a conversation I was not prepared to have. I didn't want to her talk to her about the kids. If we were going to have to talk, then it was going to be about us. The kids were off limits. I just couldn't go down that road with her right now.

"Were you talking to my mom?" she asked, folding her arms over her chest. Shit, here we go. I guess other ideas and friendly talking wasn't going to be one of them. So I can answer her with the truth, which she already knows, or I could try and blow her off.

"Yes, I was." I so don't want to do this. I don't want to have a fight and end up saying something we both will regret.

"Oh, how are they?" she said wistfully, a small smile playing about her lips.

"Who?" I asked bluntly. She ticked her head to the side to look at me curiously.

"My parents. Who else would I be asking about?" she asked in that overly sweet, innocent way she had been pulling all day. Fuck, now I have to have this conversion. She is not going to play this nice girl act all day, and not stand here and act like the kids don't even exist.

"Well, I thought you would have a little concern about how your kids were doing, but I guess I was mistaken. How could you stand there in the club the other night and say that about them, when Trina asked if you wanted to see them? How could you stand here and not ask about them today? You have been with me all fucking day and not once have you asked me how they were. Do you not care one bit about them? They are your kids! They are part of you and me. I just don't get it," I growled, and fought the urge to knock that shocked look off of her face.

"I'm the one who doesn't care? I come home and my whole family is gone. You took my kids away from me! I was going through hell and you took my family from me, I didn't sleep for weeks because I didn't know where you were. I didn't know if you were safe or if you were living on the streets, or hell, even in L.A. anymore. So put yourself in my shoes," she snarled back at me.

"What? You weren't the one lying awake every night, worrying if your wife was ever going to come home, and listening to your daughter cry herself to sleep, calling for her mother that never answered her. You were not the one who was asked every day and night if mommy was coming home. You didn't have to hear her ask you what she did wrong to make you stop loving her. And you weren't the one who laid in a hospital room by yourself, having a baby, crying for your wife. So don't give me this martyr shit, because you don't get to play that card. Now I have work to do, and I'm done with this. And you." I stormed off back to the screening room. I pulled my chair out and threw myself down into it. I start the dailies back up and shake my head, trying desperately not to cry.

Fortunately, a distraction offered itself to me at that moment. A soft rap on the door turned my head around to see Beck standing there in all his pretty boy good looks. I rise from my seat and walk over to him, wrapping him in a delighted hug.

"Hey," he said. There was a richness to his voice that I hadn't heard over the phone. Apparently acting on Broadway brought out the best in his voice. "I saw Tori just outside the door. She was crying. Is this the problem you called me about?"

"No. Well, yes, in a way. But no. Come over here. We got to fix this movie. I'm hoping you'll help out with this actor who makes Trina look talented." We both laugh, and I continue, "I know, big job. But hopefully you'll be up to it? Let me rewind this daily and you can see what you'll be working with." I hope.

I hear her walk back into the room while we're talking and slide into the seat next to me. "This guy can't act if his life depended on it. How did Keith ever think he was a good actor?" I look at her out of the corner of my eye. I can see that she had been crying and I start to feel bad.

"Apparently, he gives better head then he acts," Tori said, wiping a stray tear away. I had to give this to her, she always knew how to push her emotions aside when she needed to. I, on the other hand, you could still tell I was pissed.

"Porn it is for him then. Don't need much acting skills there," I said, getting a laugh from everyone in the room.

"From Broadway to porn. Beck, you really have the acting portfolio," Cat said, making us all jump. I had forgotten I had called her, too. I jumped up out of my chair, missing my footing and landing on my ass. "Dear God, my ass has had the worse day today." Beck helped me up and we walked over to the two couches that stood against the far wall. "So, Beck, that is our leading male role." I say, pointing to the screen and shaking my head. "Tori is the female role, so we are good there. At least we have one good actor." Beck looked over at me, giving me a look that I just didn't understand.

"What kept you?" Beck asked Cat as we sat down.

"Fans. Photos. Autographs. God, I love this. Beats babysitting all to hell and back," Cat replied, an especially dopy grin on her face. Beck grinned back at her and turned to face the screen again. After a few moments, he looked over at me.

"Well, you're the director on this, so if anyone can kick him into shape, it's you," Beck said, while putting his arm around Cat's shoulder. She sighed and snuggled down, closing her eyes.

"I don't know. That's why I'm asking you here," I said. He looked at me with a smile.

"So you really think if we double team this nub that he'll get better?"

"With Tori's help on set, as well. I hope so anyway. We did it in school and made a failing project into the best that school ever knew. Just think what we can do with this movie if we work together, all of us," I said with so much emotion, I could feel myself getting excited.

"I think it's worth the challenge. Plus a chance to work with you again would be fun. So how did he get this part away?" Beck said with a grimace, as Bruce spectacularly failed on one take. I wouldn't even think of using that as an outtake, it was so bad.

"He got the job on the casting couch. And he sucked there, too," Tori said very bluntly. Yet another change in my wife, some of these changes I like, but others are very displeasing.

"Cat, you said the other night that you would like to get a soundtrack. What do you say?" I was hoping that my friends would pull through for me and not make me look like a total ass here. Beck and Cat shared a look that made me think that all bets were off.

"What about you, Cat? Are you going to be joining the soundtrack?" Tori asked. Cat didn't answer right away. In fact, she didn't even look at Tori. I know that Cat is still very angry with my wife for everything that she had done to me, but this is business. We can't let our personal lives get in the way.

"I know it looks like I'm being selfish here, but I'm not. This will be Tori's movie, and my first directing job. Beck this will be yet another thing for you to put on your resume, a directing job. Cat, this will give you and Tori both a chance to get a soundtrack under your belts, and if we all work together and leave our personal feelings aside, then we may even get a great movie, if not an Oscar, out of it. This is what we have wanted since high school. We have talked about all of us working on a project together. Here it is, with a nice shiny bow, handed right to us." I watched the three of them. I knew that I was winning, I just didn't know how long it was going to take for them to give in.

"You're right. We have wanted this, and I want a soundtrack, so I'll do it. I'll call my manager in the morning and get things settled." This was not going to be easy for her, but I know she will try her best to get along, for me.

"Well, Jade, it looks like the music part is down, but I don't think I can help you out," he declared while looking down at his hands.

"Why not? You said you were in, what changed?" I was starting to panic. I didn't want to go down in flames, and my best bet to avoid that had just turned me down. I twitched a few times, unable to decide if leaping to my feet to pace or to rip my hair out was the appropriate response to his bombshell.

"Sorry, babe, but I don't have a script," he laughed, looking up at me. I went cold. Murder flashed in my eyes as he bounced to his feet, dancing away as I rose up, cold certainty that I'd end the night in jail, soaked in his blood.

"You bitch! I should shave your head!" I yelled, stomping a few steps after him. His laughter, along with both Cat's and Tori's, broke through the rage and I hissed in exasperation, returning to my chair. I scooped up my coffee cup and perched on the edge of the seat, glaring at him.

"Hey, I said I'd do this and I meant it. I don't pull out at any time," he said in mock anger.

"And that's why I'm on the pill," Cat said in a matter of fact tone of voice that made me choke on my coffee and Tori spit hers out onto her lap. Beck laughed at us. Tori and I wiped the smile of his face with a double death glare.

After we talked about the movie and getting all the paperwork straight, we said our goodbyes. Beck and Cat left with Beck promising to call his agent in the morning, and Cat getting ahold of Andre to help with a song for the soundtrack.

I gathered my things to leave and waited for Tori, so I could give her a ride home. "Are you ready?" I asked as I fought with my laptop bag.

"You still want to give me a ride? I didn't think you would want to after our fight earlier," she said, surprised.

"Can we please not do this now? I don't want to fight with you," I said as I finally got my laptop into its bag.

"I don't want to fight with you either, I was just…never mind." She started walking out, and pulled out her phone.

"Dammit, Tori! What do you want from me? Do you want me to act like the last three years never happened?" I yelled at her.

"No, I don't expect you to forget, and I can't either. But do you think you can cut me some slack here. I'm clean. I have been for months, and I'm working really hard to stay that way."

"Sorry if I don't jump on you band wagon. I've been kicked off it too many times, babe," I snapped at her. "God dammit, Victoria, I said I didn't want to fight. Don't you get it? I just can't go down this road again. I just can't get my hopes up, just to lose you all over again. It hurts too much to watch you do this to yourself. Not again." I pointed to the door and we walked out to my car. The drive to her house was quiet and awkward. The only time she talked was to give me directions.

She had me slow down in front of a nice sized house in Burbank. "Can you pull in to the driveway? Remember, you have to meet the rest of the housemates. I have to introduce everyone that I talk to and work with," she told me. Mike had told me before. We walked into the house and she signed a book that sat by the door, then handed the pen to me, pointing to another book that said visitors on the cover. After signing, she took me into the living room where Mike and another guy sat.

"Hello, Mike, nice to see you again," I said nicely. "Are you going to be at work tomorrow? We have some new people coming in that you need to meet," I told him, so he knew what was going on. If this was going to help Tori, then I was going to be as helpful as I can.

"Yes, I will, and thank you, Jade. This is Scott, my partner." I turned to his partner and smiled. "Scott, this is Tori's wife, Jade."

"Oh, yes. Well, Jade, it's a pleasure to finally meet you," he said, standing up and reaching out his hand.

"Ditto." I shook his hand. I turned back to Tori, she was looking at Mike and pointing to the hallway, with an unspoken question on her face.

"Den or kitchen," was all he said, and now I am very confused. I don't get what is going on. She pulled on my sleeve to follow her. We stopped by a room that was not the kitchen, so it had to be the den. There on the floor sat a little boy around the age of two, Tori tapped on the door frame and the kid jumped up and ran to her with his arms wide open.

"Hey baby, what are you doing up so late?" she asked, taking him in her arms and hugging him tight. I was instantly pissed. How could she be like this with this kid and have nothing to do with her own? Tears rushed to my eyes. Could this be her child too? If he was, then that would mean that she was with someone that wasn't me, and worse, she would have had to cheat on me with a man. I wanted to run out of there and never see her again but then she started to talk. "Where's mommy?" The boy pointed to the kitchen and Tori smiled at him, kissing him on his cheek. She sat him down. Then was off to the kitchen. "I'm here, Fran," she said, and walked back into the hallway, putting her bag on a table and took her shoes off, placing them by her bag. She then faced the wall behind her. She put her hands on the wall above her head and spread her legs apart. I was mortified on what I was witnessing and embarrassed for my wife.

This Fran came out and started to pat Tori down. After she emptied her pockets, Fran made Tori take her shirt off and loosen her waist band. She checked in my wife's bra and underwear. When she was done, she patted Tori on the shoulder, then turned to her shoes and bag. She took everything out of her bag, looking in every pocket and in her makeup kit. She looked in Tori's shoes and finally said, "You're clean, you can go downstairs if you want." Tori smiled and gathered her things, putting everything back in her bag. Taking her shoes, she turned to the stairs leading to basement. Immediately, she turned back and placed her hand on my shoulder. I'm pushed forward a few steps.

"Fran, this is Jade," she tells Fran, looking at her hands and biting her lip. Fran was watching her with a look of concern, almost a motherly concern. I could tell that this lady was more than just a house guard.

"I'm her wife. It's nice to meet you." I reach my hand out to her. She smiled and shook my hand.

"It's nice to finally meet you. I have heard a lot about you." Oh, now I'm scared. Lord only knows what she said. The big, mean wife running off with the kids. But she wasn't swinging on me, so that's a good start.

"Oh, that's frightening. Everything from high school is true. After that is up for interpretation," I smile and give Tori a quick glare before turning back to Fran.

"No, you came out looking good. Can I get you something to drink?" Cool. I came out good. At least I didn't come out evil. Now I know I've lost my bad side.

"No, thank you. I'm good," I say through stiff lips. Meeting these people is one thing, but I'm not ready to be all chummy with them yet. I turn my eyes to Tori, begging for a way out.

"Is it okay if I take Jade to my place, just to show her around?" Tori asked.

"She's your wife and not a threat, so I have no problem with that. However, Jade, I will have to look through your bag before you can go with her. I don't have to frisk you, but house rules, you understand." No. I don't understand. I don't understand any of what I have witnessed here tonight.

I hand over my bag to her and watched her start to pull things out. "I'm sorry, but I don't understand any of this. I don't understand why I had to meet everyone here, or why you have to go through my bag. I'm not trying to be difficult, I just don't understand. What Mike told me earlier, or what I just witnessed my wife go through. So will someone please tell me what is going on?" I felt a tear run down my face. I was so upset. I couldn't believe that she would be reduced to this treatment. I heard the other two walk into the kitchen. I was so mad. I wanted answers.

"Please, don't cry, Jade. This is a halfway house. I moved here after I left rehab. Thanks to Mike, I was lucky enough to get in here and have my own place in the basement. Every time I come back I have to go through that. It's just to keep everyone safe and me honest. If someone brings me home, then I have to bring them in so they know who I have been with. I have to sign in and out and call while I am out. This is all part of my treatment." Tori backed up against the wall as she told me everything. Tears were falling as she watched me take it all in.

"I should have prepared you, I just didn't know how. I have been an emotional wreck since Friday night. I didn't know I was going to see you at the club. And then today! I didn't know what I was supposed to do, so I asked Mike to stay on set with me after he met everyone. You were acting so weird that I didn't know what was going to happen. I just…" I put my hand up to stop her from talking.

"You're past explaining. Now you're babbling." I sighed deeply and pinched the bridge of my nose. "Look, why don't you show me your place and we can talk about this. Fran, if you don't mind, I will take that drink." I smiled at the lady. I walked over to Tori and put my hand on her shoulder, letting her know that it will be okay. "Tori, I can see that you want to make this work. I will help and do whatever is needed, but this is the last time. I can't keep going around in circles." I turn to Mike and smile. "Let's talk." We turn and walk into the living room.

**A/N Please review**


	4. La Vie Boheme

**Chapter 4  
><strong>**La Vie Boheme**

After I talked to Tori's housemates, I started to feel a little better about what was going on. I found out that Tori had gone into rehab two months after I left, staying there for ninety days. I found out that Tori had been living here for three months, six months has been the longest she has ever stayed clean. I also found out that the little boy is Fran's. She didn't live here, up until Tori moved in. She thought it would be easier for Tori if she was here full time.

Tori took me to her place in the basement. We walked down the stairs into a full basement apartment. Walking into the living room, she had an entertainment system set up in front of a couch, and there was a la-z-boy chair to one side with a table in between the couch and chair. There was a table up against the back wall, with a door next to it. Tori told me through there was the kitchen, and it only had a refrigerator and a microwave, but no stove and that she had to have meals up with the others. She pointed to the far wall to the left, showing me a door, telling me it was her full bathroom. Next to it was her bedroom. "Sounds like you have everything you need here," I muttered. I didn't want to sound like I was glad that she was happy living somewhere else without me, but at the same time, I didn't want her to feel like I was mad that she was. I knew that Tori needed to be here and work her treatment, but it was hard to see that she could be happy without me.

"Yeah, I have what I need, but I don't have what I want. I just need to focus on getting better." She looked around, not making eye contact. It reminded me of when she first started to dabble in the drugs back in high school. She would never look at me, afraid that I would notice that she was high. Then in our senior year, she got her record deal and we got married. I thought everything was going to be great for us, and then she went on her first US tour. And that is where I started to lose my wife.

"Tori, you have to make your choice this time. You can have me and the kids, or you can have your drugs, but you will not have both. So, if you don't stay clean this time, I will not be back, and I will find you an unfit mother, and you will never see the kids again. I know I'm being harsh, but you have to know that this is your last chance. There will be no more," I told her in a quivering voice. She had a devastated look on her face, but she nodded slowly. I wrapped her in a hug, and saw myself out.

The next day, I walked in on the sound stage to find Beck and Cat talking to Mark, and Andre was there. I looked around to see if my actors were there yet, but I didn't see them. "Hey, guys. Where is everyone?"

"The leading man isn't here yet, and Tori is in her dressing room with some guy," Beck told me with worry on his face and dripping disgust from the words' some guy'.

"Mike?" I asked Mark, who nodded confirmation before I turned back to Beck and Cat and waved Andre over. "Alright, guys, so you know. Mike is one of Tori's drug and alcohol counselors. He will be on set with her, watching and talking to her throughout the day. He will also want to meet each of you, so he knows who Tori is working with, so please, be nice," I tell them. "If you don't, then you'll probably end up acting like a total jackass, like I did. Mike is also one of her housemates, along with another counselor and a house guard. Mike has to watch everything that she does to make sure that she is staying clean," I say to them. However, Beck still looked like he didn't understand. I cleared my throat, preparing to clarify everything for him when Cat took over.

"It's called 'The Program.' It is a rehab program that works with inpatient and outpatient treatments. The halfway houses are small. They have only one to three in the house, with two counselors and a house guard. The patients are not allowed to have cell phones and cannot stay over at anyone else place until their treatment is complete. Inpatient rehab, they have to be there for sixty to ninety days, and then up to five months in the halfway house, if they are lucky enough to get into one. The Program is a onetime deal, if you do complete the program and you start using again, you can get back in to the rehab, but you cannot get into a halfway house. If you do not complete the program, then you are done completely. You can't even get into the rehab, you would have to go to a state ran one. Tori is lucky she was able to get into the program at all, let alone a house, and I hope she makes it work this time," Cat concluded. We all stared at her, shocked. Beck was looking like he couldn't believe his ears.

"How do you know about this stuff?" he asked.

"Because I got their information when I had to get Sam into it, and when she cleaned up, I started thinking that it may just work for Tori, but by that time, no one knew where she was."

"I guess she found out for herself. How is she doing, Jade?" Andre asked.

"I don't know. Seems like she's doing better, but she always did in the beginning, then she would fall right back into her old ways. But I have to go put a boot into their asses, because Bruce just walked in and we have a movie to make." I turned and walked off to the dressing room to find Tori.

"Mike, I don't know if I can do this," I heard Tori say as I walked up to the door that was half opened.

"Why not? You told me that you went to a preforming arts school where you acted in lot of plays. So why is this any different?" he asked her.

"I didn't have carry such a rotten actor as Bruce. Even Robbie wasn't as bad as him, and he had a puppet."

"He didn't?" Mike laughed.

"Mike, I just can't do this. I'm just lying to myself, thinking I can."

I walked in, smiling at Mike. "Tori, you can do this. You have the talent and the drive. Besides, it's okay to lie to yourself. We're in the business of lying. We lie to make people believe we are someone else, so go out there and be someone you're not," I tell her, putting an arm around her shoulders and guiding her to the door. We all walk out, and Tori heads over to make-up for touchups, and Mike and I walk back to the director's chairs.

"How are you doing today, Jade?" Mike asked me after we had settled into the seats.

"I'm not going to lie. Last night was a lot to take in, but I want this to work for her. I just don't think she will survive another relapse." I picked up my clipboard and started looking through it.

"When she was brought to us, she was past hitting rock bottom. I really do believe she is ready to make it work." I stopped looking through the papers and gave him my full attention.

"Can you tell me who brought her to you?" I asked, not sure if I wanted to know, in case it was one of my friends. That would mean they had been lying to me.

"It was a young man. He never gave us his name, but he did pay for her rehab, including her housing now, with a credit card. The name on the account was Sinjin Van Cleef. We never saw him again. Do you know this young man?" I thought I was going to fall off my chair. Sinjin saved my Tori, and paid for her rehab?

"Y-yes. We went to school together. He was one of the geeks that never really got along with the in crowd, but we knew him. I can't believe he did that," I stuttered. I instantly decide to forgive him for everything creepy he did, if he could do this for Tori.

"Well, geek paid off for him. When he came in he was in a three piece suit, paid for everything without batting an eye, and then drove away in a stretched limo. I looked up his company. Had to send an invoice, after all. It is Van Cleef Technologies. It is a division of Microsoft and its partners, so I do believe your friend has made a name for himself." He laughed at the look I gave him. I felt like a landed fish, gaping at him. I snapped my mouth shut and wrote a note for myself on the clipboard to remember to send Sinjin a thank you card and fruit basket, or something like that.

Beck joined us at the chairs, and it was time to start shooting. I watched as Tori hit every line and every mark, but there was something a little off with her. I watched as Bruce messed up almost every line, and he even tried to stand on Tori's mark once, when she was on it herself. Shaking my head, I yelled cut. Turning to Beck, I told him, "You need to go talk to that brainless twit. I'll be right back." I started to walk off the set.

"Where are you going?" Beck asked me over his shoulder as he strode toward Bruce.

"To find a pair of scissors and paper. I need to think!" I yelled, walking back to the offices. When I came back, everyone was sitting waiting for me. I start cutting the paper into little pieces.

"She hasn't done that in years," Tori said, breaking me out of my train of thought. Putting her hand on Bruce's shoulder, she gave him a sly smile and said in a stage whisper, "Well, been nice knowing ya." She blew him a kiss and gave him a small wave goodbye. She strolled away toward the food table, looking for a doughnut if she hadn't changed her morning routines. She came back a moment later with one, just like I predicted. Cake, white frosting, sprinkles. Some things never change.

"She wouldn't really use those scissors on me, would she?" Bruce asked, making Tori and Beck laugh before they both gave him a sad look.

"My dear Bruce, have you ever seen the Scissoring?" Tori asked and Bruce nodded. "Well, Jade makes that movie look like a Miracle on 34th Street. Have fun." She then walked away with that new attitude, and I can feel myself starting to warm up as I watch her.

After cutting two and a half sheet of paper, I get an idea on how to help Bruce out. I grab Beck and yell for Tori to follow me. We all went into the room where Andre and Cat were working on music. "I got an idea how to help Bruce, and hopefully make this movie. All of you are going to come over to Tori's place tonight, and I'll bring Bruce. We are going to put on our own improv class for him. Don't worry, I'll get it passed with Mike," I reassured Tori, who looked unsure. But I smiled at her. I was also, at this point, unsure. Not that Mike wouldn't let Tori's once closest friends come to her place. No, I was pretty sure that Mike would be cool. I'd heard him groaning during the lost takes. If even a non-industry guy can see how bad Bruce is…No, my worry was that Bruce wouldn't understand what the hell we were trying to teach him. Well, if not, I still have the scissors.

Beck, Tori, and I returned to the set, and we shot the scenes that only had Tori, and they were out of this world amazing. Tori's performance was a director's dream; her passion was like no other. I could feel her desire for her part coming through the monitor. It was like an orgasm of acting. The hunger she brought it left me craving her.

After a productive day, I bid the others goodbye and walked over to Bruce. "Hey, how about dinner?" I said to him, which made him straighten up in surprise.

"Well, I suppose so. You don't have those scissors, do you?" he asked with a nervous chuckle. I felt my face twist into a smug smirk.

"No, Bruce. I don't have those scissors on me," I demurred, putting heavy emphasis on the word 'those.' I didn't have any scissors, in fact, but the insinuation I did might make him pay more attention. He might be a terrible actor, but he's not an idiot. He caught what I said. I know exactly when he figures it out, because his face goes pale. "Come on, Bruce. Where you want to eat?"

He names a restaurant, and I get the production credit card. I sure wasn't going to pop for this. I lead him to my car, and we both climb in. Traffic was nice to me, and we were able to get to the restaurant without much hassle.

Dinner was uninteresting. Bruce talked about all of his experience in acting, and I was barely able to keep from slapping him across the face with the bread basket that came with the meal. He was so proud of the movies he named, but every single one of them were box office bombs. The few he was in that did well, had him playing only a bit part just above extra. If this works tonight, I think our movie will be a smash, if only because the critics will lose their minds over his transformation.

After we had eaten, I tell him, "Bruce, you have to realize that we're having problems on set." He nodded, a wary look in his eyes as I continue. "And I'm not going to sugar coat this. A large part of the problem is you. Mark isn't all that happy with you, either. None of us want to make a bad movie, and there's a lot that can be done with editing. But a good director will actually care about the actors in her movie as well as the movie itself. I'd like to think that I'm a good director. You've had problems on other movie sets, yes?" Again, he nods. "Ok. You met Beck, right?"

"The new A.D.? Yeah. Seems like a nice guy. One of the caterers says he's dating Cat Valentine." Oh, isn't this cute, he's name dropping like I'm going to be impressed. He must not have seen her on the set today. Tonight just got a little more fun for me.

"Yeah, that's the guy. Well, the reason I hired him is because he's an actor himself. I've seen some of his early work, and I was impressed. He's been talking with me, and we've got an exercise we want to run with you, help you improve."

"Well, ok. When you want to do this?" he asks, and I swear, he's trying to put some charm in his voice. I don't know if he thinks he's coming on to me, or if he's just trying to get on my good side, but that bread basket is looking more and more like a good thing to hit him with. Shaking my head slightly, I signal for the waiter to bring the check and skewer Bruce with a withering stare.

"As soon as we get out of here. We're meeting at Tori's apartment. Couple of things. Tori is currently staying in a halfway house. That's why Mike is always with her. If you can't keep that secret, I will destroy your life and the life of everyone you know. It's been circulated that Mike is Tori's personal assistant. While that is true, he's also there to keep her on the straight and narrow. Fuck this up, and scissors will be the least of your worries. Another thing. If you have anything on you right now that would cause a problem at a halfway house, get rid of it. Dumping it in my car is not getting rid of it. You will have your pockets and shoes searched. Not by me, but the people who run the halfway house. Failure to comply is failure to enter, and most likely, failure to make a good movie. Any problems with these rules?"

Bruce shook his head. "No, Jade. Recovery came too late for my brother so I would never do anything to jeopardize someone else chance to recover."

I smile sweetly, "Well, alright then. Let's go." I rise from my chair, scooping up my Pearphone and purse and plucking the check from the hand of our returning waiter. Stopping by the pay station near the door, I got the receipt for accounting and we left the restaurant.

The drive to the Program's halfway house was a bit longer. The evening traffic was slow, and I was about fifteen minutes late getting there. I had sent Tori home early today, but I guess I could have kept her longer. I sent her home so she could go through the pat down without an audience. It had embarrassed me, and I was married to her. How much worse would it have been with Beck, Cat, Andre, and Bruce watching her go through that? Beck and Cat were sitting in their car across the street from the house, and I saw Andre standing on the porch, chatting with Scott.

We climbed from my car, and I gave a wave to Cat. She and Beck got out and we all got together on the front porch. Scott smiled at me and welcomed us inside. Fran and Mike were both there, and after introductions and pocket checks, we were all lead into the den. Fran's son was nowhere in sight tonight, and the television was off. Tori was sitting on the couch when we all came in.

"Hey, guys," she said, rising out of her seat in one smooth, graceful motion. I stand next to her, facing the others.

"We are gathered here tonight in memoriam of Eugene Sikowitz, may his coconut addled soul rest easy," I began. I flick my gaze around the group. Tori is alert, Beck is too. Cat has a slightly bummed look on her face. It's nice to see that she's finally gotten over his death. I knew it was a gamble to use his name in this, but it has been almost 3 years, so she should be beyond the wild tears stage of grief. Andre was almost smug, arms folded across his chest. Bruce, as always, looks confused. At least there was a reason, this time. I let the tiniest of smirks play about my lips. "And in his name, I begin this lesson with a drive by acting challenge. You all know what to do. Get ready."

When I had set this up, I had given everyone except Bruce a part to play. Tori was going to be a 1940's detective. I could see in the crease of the couch a large magnifying lens, and the outline of a compact in her jeans pocket. Cat was going to be a clumsy juggler, and I saw her picking books out, along with some other non-breakables, with her eyes that she was going to grab. Beck was about to turn into a caveman, who was convinced that the painting on the wall of a tiger was about to attack us all, and he was trying to protect us. Andre was going to be a game show host who had all the wrong answers to easy trivia questions on his card. He'd lose his damn mind laughing when whoever he asked got it wrong, and start crying when he was argued with. "Bruce," I said. He jumped, because the others had frozen in place. "Your part is this. Outside the door is a killer robot. No one here will know what a robot is, nor will they believe you, at least at first. You will have to identify these people, and make them believe you. You have 10 minutes to get them to help you, or you lose the challenge. I'm going to be sitting here," and I gesture to a spot on the couch, "judging the performances. Good luck, everyone. Begin."

Bruce had a perfect deer in the headlights look on his face as the others came to life around him. Andre was the first to jump in, turning to Cat. "Little Red, who was the first President of the United States?"

"Oh, that's easy," she said, scooping up a pair of blocks from the floor. "George Washington."

Andre threw his head back and laughed, "NO!" He laughed a few seconds more, then said, "I'm sorry, the correct answer was George Clooney!" Cat froze in her tracks, a book and a pillowcase in her hands, along with the two blocks.

"What? Are you crazy? I think your card is wrong, Andre!" Cat replied. She turned away and threw all four items into the air at once, which went in four different directions. She flailed her hands about, trying to catch them.

Andre had fallen to his knees while this happened, and made relatively convincing sobbing noises. I nod approval before looking over at Bruce. The fear is gone from his face, but he's watching the others, with no move to start himself.

Beck slumped forward, leaning so his hands stretched closer to the ground. I watch as he picks up an umbrella that was in a rack near the den's entrance. He held it in the middle. He moved about slowly, like a hunter. He turned his head and saw the tiger painting. His eyes go wide and he points in terror at the painting. He leaps between Tori and the painting, thrusting the umbrella toward it. Tori take a step back in surprise, and begins speaking.

"It was a cloudy night in the city. The kind of night that just draws you down and makes you all kinds of crazy. I had told that new secretary the agency had pawned off on me that this overcast weather always brought out the nuts." Tori lifted the magnifying glass up from the couch and studied Beck through the lens. "Case in point. I got a real knockout fella waving a spear at a picture."

Beck turned to her, and grunted out "Beck save tiny lady!" before stabbing at the picture again. Tori turned her magnifying glass on the painting, studying it.

"Clearly, some diabolical fiend has used loopy powder on this man. Here's looking at you, pal." Her head tracked to the side and caught sight of Bruce. "You look rather suspicious. Where were you on the evening of March 5th, 1947?" she questioned, striding up to him, whipping out her compact and proceeding to dust his fingerprints.

"Uh," was all Bruce could manage. He pulled his hand back, and just in time. He lifted both hands and caught a block and a book that Cat had just sent flying across the room again. He looked at them before meeting Tori's eye, gigantic in the lens she was peering through at him with. "I'm sorry, detective, but I have to go now." He placed the block and the book on the end table and turned toward the door.

"Well, don't leave town, ya mook! I'll probably have more questions for you," Tori responded. Bruce ducked his head and hurried toward the door. This is where it gets tricky. Does he play his part, or run out the door. I know this is tough, especially when you don't know what's going on. But this is how Sikowitz taught us. I miss having a random camcorder shoved in my face and a scene yelled at me. Why'd you have to die, you jerk?

Thankfully, my thoughts were drug back to what was happening in front of me when Andre asked, "For 25 points, Tori, what animated movie had a hit song titled 'Let It Go?'"

"It was a foggy night in the city when I saw that down at the Cineplex," replied Tori, "but I'll never forget that the title was 'Frozen'" Andre grabbed Tori by the shoulder to keep from falling down, laughing like a hyena at his feet.

"I'm terribly sorry, Tori, the answer we were looking for is 'Brave.'" Andre has the card snatched from his hand and Tori examines it.

"Incorrect! You clearly made a mistake on the card," she responds. Andre doubles over in tears. At this point, I realize that yes, this has failed. My friends are still as amazing as ever, but Bruce ran like the gank that he is. I'm just about to call a stop to the proceedings, ducking a book that spiraled end over end at my face from Cat, when Bruce came charging back into the room. I glance at my watch. Only two minutes down. He might still pull this off, and man am I glad he came back.

"Detective, detective! I need your help!" He skidded to a stop in front of Tori.

"Another looker has just paid a visit to my office. He claims he needs my help. I can't wait to hear what kind of problems a classy guy like him could have," Tori narrated.

"Detective, there is a giant robot out there, preparing to attack us! Please, you have to help me. Our lives, the city, are at stake!" Bruce said, waving a hand at the door he had just come through.

Andre walked up beside him. "For 30 points, Bruce, What is a robot?"

Bruce blinked at him twice. "It is a metal man, one that has a computer brain, and this one has a flamethrower and rocket launcher attached to it's arms!" Nice, adding details.

"I'm sorry, Bruce, but the correct answer is 'Nothing. You just made it up to fool us,'" Andre said, laughing again while obviously reading aloud from the card he held.

Bruce grabbed the card away, and tore it in half, flinging the pieces aside. "Listen here, you Alex Trebek wannabe," close enough, I'll give it to him, "whoever made your cards got them wrong. I need all of your…" help, I'm sure the word was going to be, but at that moment the pillow case Cat was trying to juggle flopped across his face, silencing him.

Bruce reached up and slowly peeled the pillow case off his head. He looked toward Cat, "You have to be the worst juggler ever. But we can use that. Your randomly flying blocks will act as perfect targets so the robot will attack them, not us. Brave hunter!" he cried, waving Beck over. "The tiger will not hurt Tori. You must join us in hunting the metal man!" He turned back toward the door of the den and yelled, "To victory!" and let Tori, Beck, and Cat toward the door.

"End scene!" I call out. The five of them returned to stand in front of the couch. "Good job, guys! That was excellent. Do you know what you did wrong, Bruce?"

"Wrong?" he said, sounding insulted. Good, it's affecting him. "I didn't do anything wrong," he stated. Andre shook his head.

"Not quite. You had Tori's loyalty to the city, Cat's horrible juggling, Beck's hunting, but all you did to my character was insult him."

The pained look on Bruce's face made me feel good. There might be a real actor in there after all. "Andre's right. I'm going to give you an eighty-five out of one hundred on that test. And shockingly, you didn't stutter, you didn't trip, you didn't run into anyone during the whole exercise. Why is that?"

"I'm not sure. I guess it could be it was easier to make it up than stick to the script," Bruce said, without making eye contact.

"Could be. Well, we're going to do, like, four or five more runs tonight. Then tomorrow, we're going to try to see how you do on the set with improv. You have read the script, right?" He nodded, again, an insulted look on his face. "Ok, so we'll try shooting without strict script following. If I need a specific line, I'll tell you, but for now, let's see if you can play make up into a better performance."

I was impressed with Bruce's performance the next day. He really put an effort to his acting. He is getting there a couple more section and he will be a fair actor however I want a great actor so I will not give up on this guy. Beck was watching Bruce and was writing down some pointers to go over with him at lunch. Tori had come up with some small hand jesters that would help Bruce remember his marks while on set and would not interfere with filming. In all I think that Bruce will work as our leading man after all.

After today's shooting, I was watching dailies. Tori and Mike stayed behind again with me. "So, how are they today? Any good?" she asked. Mike's phone rang and he excused himself and took it in the hall.

"Yeah, they're really good, but this leading lady sucks. I think we need to get a new one," I said with a smile.

"Oh, really? Maybe you should have her do the Bird Scene," Tori laughed as she sat down next to me.

"No, that really sucked when you did it in school. I don't want to see it again."

"You! That was pretty great what you did for Bruce, and I had a lot of fun. I didn't know if I was going to have fun with everyone there or not. Don't get me wrong, I love our friends, but I haven't been the poster girl of friendship in the last few years," she said, looking down at her hands. I held in a sigh, wanting to alternately blast her for the self doubt, and to berate her with her failures. Neither one would be productive, and both mildly hurtful, so I just gave her a strained smile and turned back to the dailies.

"Can I ask you a question?" I asked a few moments later, and turned back to her. It had been eating at me since I found out that Sinjin was the one who took her to rehab. I wanted to know if she even knew that he was the one who took her.

"Sure, I guess…I mean, you have to have questions, being left out for so long," she said, moving to the couch.

She's right. I have tons of questions, but I'm not going to ask all those right now. "Do you know how you got to rehab?" I brought up the Final Cut on the Apple and muted the sound. Then I went and sat next to Tori on the couch.

"Yes, I do. It was Sinjin." She looked at me sideways, noting that I had not reacted in a big way. "You knew? Alright, well, I ran into him and his wife one night. They talked me into going to a hotel to get rested up and a hot meal, then Sinjin and his sister took me to rehab the next morning." She picked at her fingernails, like she was hiding something.

"Tori, what is it?" I wasn't sure if I wanted to know what it was.

"Sinjin didn't ask me any questions, or treat me like a junkie. He just took me to the hotel, rented a penthouse apartment, and let me clean up. He didn't ask for anything in return. He told me about the rehab and that he was going to take me there, no fucking questions asked." She shook her head. "He paid for everything, and told them if it is leaked that I'm there, he would sue them for everything they're worth, then take their souls. Sinjin has become very scary, and not the wholesome creepy he used to be." She giggled and looked up at me for the first time. "He told me that when I complete the treatment and stay clean, he will back my come back tour." She smiled at me, shyly. I was immediately on red alert. Going on the road is what caused the problems in the first place. She can't go back out there! But with a huge effort, I shifted my thinking. Why shouldn't she? Who am I to deny her her career? But we'll cross that bridge when we get there. An obvious solution crosses my mind, and I ask her about it.

"Will you have someone like Mike with you when you go back out on tour? Not saying that you couldn't handle it on your own, but I'm learning that it helps to have someone there to help keep you in check. Mike has been getting me to check in here, too, and I'm finding it is helping to have someone to talk to," I told her as I got up and moved back over to the computer. "I have to get these done. I have to get the kids tonight. Your mom and dad have a big day tomorrow," I say to her as I sit down.

"Of course I'll have someone like Mike with me. I'm already looking at hiring several helpers to keep me straight when I go out. And my parents, what are they up to?"

"Your dad is retiring from the police force, and they have a big party to go to," I fill her in. She sits next to me in the chair that the AD should have been sitting in, but Beck was more than happy to give me time with Tori. Besides, with Cat in studio writing a song for the movie, I'm sure he's there with her. He might not have Andre's chops with the Soundtrack Pro editor software, but he could run a soundboard well enough.

"Have you told them that I was back?" she asked me. There was worry in her voice, and longing too. I give her a reassuring smile.

"No. You didn't tell me to, so I wasn't going to go behind your back if I could help it," I tell her. She looks relieved.

"Jade, do you think my parents will care I was back? I mean, do you think they would want to see me?" she asked, and I think she is starting to see the bridges she had burned through the years of using. My heart aches in sympathy with her pain.

"They're your parents, and I'm sure they would want to see you…" I said, my voice trailing off at the end.

"But?" she asked meekly.

"I don't know until we ask. Do you want me to ask?" I say to her with a smirk. She thinks quietly for a moment before answering me.

"Yes."

"Tonight?" I raise an eye brow.

"Yes." She looks at the floor. I can see that this is costing her, but I know a little pain now will heal a lot of pain later. So I'm full speed ahead on this.

"Okay, then. When I pick up the kids, I'll ask them. Do you need to clear this with Mike first?"

"No. It has always been on my time to call or go see them." Just then, Mike walked back into the screening room.

"Hey, Tori, it's getting really late and we have to get back." He smiled at me and pointed at the screen. "You did a good thing there, Jade, and Bruce will be better for it. You should be happy that you were able to reach out to him, and help him realize that he does have a talent. I'm proud of you, Jade. You are more than just a good director, you are a good teacher and a good person." He walked over and gave me a hug, leaving me with a feeling I haven't felt in a long time. I felt good. I felt like I was wanted by someone, a friend, and it felt damn good. I think I see a light at the end of this long, dark, cold tunnel. I leave a note for Mark that I will come in early to finish dailies, and I leave to get my kids.

I have a conversation to have when I get to the Vega's. I hope it will be a good one.


	5. Purple Rain

**Chapter 5**

**Purple Rain**

I pull up to the Vega's to get the kids, and I become nervous. I don't know how to tell them about Tori. I keep telling myself that it's good news, and I don't have to tell them that she is in the hospital, or worse, that she's dead. Oh shit, there has been so many times I had dreaded the late night phone calls, or the cop cars coming down the street. I always feared that one of those calls were going to be someone telling me that Tori was found dead, or the cops coming to get me to claim her body. Now I know she is safe, and I have to go tell her parents that she is alive and would like to see them. I'm sure they'll be receptive, but still, lingering doubt is a bitch.

I get out of the car and walk to the door. Slipping the key in the lock, I open the door, quietly letting myself in. I find Mr. and Mrs. Vega sitting in the living room talking quietly. "Hey, guys. I tried to make it back early," I said as I walked in, taking a seat on the other couch closest to the door.

"You're fine dear. How was your night?" Mrs. Vega asked.

"Good. We got a lot done today, and the leading man is getting much better," I said with a smile.

"Have you eaten? I saved you some dinner," Mrs. Vega said, getting up.

"Thank you, Mrs. Vega. I am actual pretty hungry." And I am. I don't think I stopped to eat all day while filming. I really should pay more attention to my eating habits. And Mrs. Vega is such a good cook.

"Jade, how many times do I have to tell you, it's Holly, not Mrs. Vega," she told me, handing me my dinner. Oh yum. This baked salmon smells delightful. And the crushed walnut crust is perfectly crispy. A little butter and a serving of rice, and I'm in heaven.

"And don't even think you're going to get away with calling me Mr. Vega, anymore," David told me, laughing. We walked to the table where I ate my dinner. Afterwards, I was finally ready to tell them.

"Holly, can you come sit back down. I have something to tell you guys." I took a deep breath when she sat down and looked at both of them. Holly started getting nervous. "I have some information about Tori. She is safe. She has completed a ninety day inpatient rehab, and now is in a halfway house. She is in what is called The Program…"

David slammed his hand down on the table and smiled, "Yes! That's my girl! I knew she would find the way back." He took Holly's hand in his, bringing it to his mouth for a kiss. "She is in the best rehab program that there is. She's going to get better, mama, our baby is going to get better!" he said with tears in his eyes.

"She wants to see you, but, of course, that is totally up to you." I wanted to tell them about the movie, but I didn't know how they would take it.

"I don't know if I can handle seeing her in a halfway house. They may be clean, they may be nice, but there is still that air of depression, which is probably all in my head. I guess, if there was another place that she was allowed to go," David said, and Holly just nodded. She obviously did not trust herself to speak, she was biting on her knuckles, and her face was flushed.

"Well," I said, slowly, "there is another place that she is allowed." I looked at them and smiled. "She's the new leading lady on the movie. I was 'introduced' to her the day I became the director. What a shock that was! So we could have you come to the set. I could get it set up with Mike, her drug and alcohol counselor, and all round good guy. He also talks to me about my problems, and sits with me when I'm directing, so no one has gotten stabbed, yay Mike." They laugh, knowing that I did have a dark side at one time in my life.

"Sounds good. It would be nice to see where you work, Jade, and I can't wait to see Tori again. How about the kids? Would they get to see her too?" Holly finally asked, still teary eyed. I shook my head sadly.

"No, she still has time before she is allowed to see the kids, and then only at the house, and only when I say it's okay. It's a little different at her house than others, most have two to three patients in a house, but because Tori is famous, she is the only one in hers. So, when it comes time for her to get to see the kids, then she can at the house. I have been there twice, and I think it would be okay for the kids to visit, as long as Tori works her treatment." I smile at them and watch and they hug each other. "I want you to know, Tori isn't in this alone. I'm by her side, and so are our friends Cat, Beck, and Andre. And we are here for you, too, if you need us." I yawn and shake my head. "I need to get the kids home before I fall asleep." I say, blinking my eyes until they almost close.

"Nope, you're not driving. The kids are already asleep anyway. You go right upstairs and get into bed. You can go home in the morning." Holly points to the stairs and David gives me a knowing smirk. If I were to say anything other than yes, Holly would let me have it.

"Yes Mom," I say dutifully, kissing her on the cheek, and make my way to the guestroom. It had been my room when I moved in here after my parents kicked me out when I came out to them. Then it became Tori's and mine after we got married. We were still in high school, and moving out was not a good idea. Then Tori got her record deal, and went on tour and I stayed here to finish school. I looked around, remembering all the good times we had in this room. All the stupid sleep overs we had with Cat. All the times that Tori would sneak down here and sleep with me, until right before her mom's alarm clock would go off. It was in this room that she got the call about the record deal, and it was in this room that we talked about having kids, and it was in this room that we picked the donor. And it was in this room that we did the first pregnancy test. It was also in this room when Tori came home from her first tour, strung out. And it was in this room, I cried when I realized that I had lost my wife to a life I didn't belong in. Now it is in this room that I know I have found her again.

The next day, I left early to drop the kids off at school and daycare before going over to Tori's. I wanted to talk to Mike about bringing Holly and David to the set, and also give the good news to Tori that her parents did indeed want to see her. I wanted to get them together as soon as possible; they have been apart for far too long. I truly feel that having Tori's parents back in her life will help her so much, because they were so close.

After I dropped Blade off at daycare, I called Mike to tell him about the conversation I had with the Vega's last night. "Hey, Mike. It's Jade. Sorry it's so early," I tell him when he answered his phone.

"Hey, no problem. I told you, day or night, no matter what time. I'm here for you. So, what's up?" He sounded like he just woke up.

"Did you just wake up?" I almost didn't want to go over if everyone was still getting up.

"No, we had a long night…Tori had a bad night, but I think she may be on the winning side now," he told me. I wanted to get there as fast as I could, but I was still twenty- five minutes away.

"What happened? Is she okay? Did she have a relapse? Is she out of the house? I'm on my way." I didn't give him a chance to answer before I hung up and jumped into my car, speeding off to Tori.

Twenty-five grueling minutes later, I pulled up into the driveway of the halfway house. Grabbing my bag, I jumped out of my car and ran to the front door. Ringing the doorbell, I waited for someone, anyone, to answer. Scott opened the door, and I grabbed his hand, pulling him out onto the porch. "Scott, I can't do this. I can't go in there blind. You have to tell me what happened." I was freaking out. I wanted my wife, but I also wanted to run as far as I could. Scott start to put me at ease when he chuckled before answering.

"Tori had a bad night. She is still going through withdrawals, and last night was one of her really bad nights. I would, at this time, turn people away from seeing her, but I do believe that you could help remind her that there is something to work for, to live for. If you want to come in, then you are more than welcome, but just remember. Tori is going to have her good days and bad days. But have faith, Jade. One day, they will all be good days and she won't need to feed the demons anymore." He opened his arms and I fell into the hug, welcoming the embrace.

"I just don't know what to do. I want to yell and scream, but I also want to curl up in a ball and cry. What do I do?" I asked into his chest.

"That, my dear, is the question every one of us has had to ask at one point in time. Do we hate the one that is hurting us because they are hurting themselves, or do we stand by and wait until the storm passes? Mike has had to ask, I have had to ask, Fran has had to ask, and now, little one, it is your turn to ask. And only you can answer the question, with other questions. Are you strong enough, stubborn enough, or just too tired to do anything else? When you can answer those questions, then you can help the person you love the most."

I went into the house to find Tori sitting in the living room, showered and ready for the day. "Hey, you're here early. What's up?" she asks me with a sad smile.

"I wanted to tell you what happened last night with your parents, but then I found out what happened here. You had withdrawals…great, perfect, love to hear it. It was withdrawals and not relapses. You had a withdrawal and didn't give in. I'll take it, that's one score for the home team," I said, taking her in to my arms and hugging her tight.

She started to cry into my chest. "I never meant to cause you any problems, and I'm sorry for all the pain." Tori pulled back, staying in my arms. "Jade, recovery can take up to two years," she tells me with tears in her eyes.

I wiped the one fallen tear, and looked into those beautiful brown eyes I had fallen in love with so long ago. "Good news is, you already have six months down. So fight it like you would a school yard bully." I gave her a nod like I have told her the smartest thing ever.

"You want me to marry it?" She tilted her head and smirked, no doubt enjoying the surprised look on my face.

"Right…babe, you just have to fight the demons as they come, and I will be here to help you as long as you want me to be." I took her back into my arms and place a chaste kiss on her lips. "And so will your parents. I talked to them last night, and they said yes," I told her as I broke the kiss. "So we just need to make a time to have them come to the set," I tell her and the others. Letting go of her, I opening my bag and started digging.

"Well, why the set? Why not here?" Mike asked.

"Two birds…they want to see her on set, it had been their dream, too. They never missed one of her plays in school, or concerts when she was in L.A. and they want to see her on a movie set." I shrug, telling him as I finally find my date book. I begin flipping through it, showing them all the days they could make it. I handed the book over to Tori, who looked it over and gave it to Mike.

"Looks like we have some plans to make. If you're okay with this, Tori," he said, shifting his gaze back and forth between the book and Tori. She drew in a shuddering breath, then threw her hands out to her side and down. I heard her shoulders pop. Lucky girl. My shoulders have been aching for a few weeks now. I wish I could pop them as easily as she just did. Maybe I'll visit the studio masseuse over lunch break. I bring my attention back to Tori as she grinned out a bright smile.

"Yep. I can't wait." We made a rough plan at the house, before leaving for work. It was going to be a long day for Mike and Tori. I drove us to the studio, so they could rest on the way.

I hope that Tori can fight these withdrawals and not give in to them. I will do whatever I can to help. No matter how long she had been gone, it only took seeing her that Friday night at the club to know I still love her. I'm happy I'm getting my Tori back, even one day at a time.


	6. My Happy Ending

Chapter 6

My Happy Ending

I walked onto the set with Tori's parents. I sat them down next to Beck and then went to get Tori out of her dressing room. I knocked on the door, and I was surprised to see it was Fran who opened the door. Walking in, I saw that not only Fran was here, but Mike and Scott are here, too. "The whole team is here…Tori, you okay with this?" I ask, walking closer to my wife.

"Yes, I'm okay. I just thought since they have to meet my parents, they can just come to the set. Like you said, two birds, right?" she smiled at me.

"Right. Then I'll get some more chairs. And we're ready for you, beautiful," I said. Walking out of the dressing room, I stop a kid running by and tell him to get more chairs.

"So is he one of the people that get you everything you need?" Scott asks me.

"I don't know, he looked like he knew what he was doing," I tell him as we walk over to the chairs. "Guess I picked right." I give Scott a smirk as he and Fran sit down with the others. I walked out onto the set and smiled at Tori. "Okay, you ready for this?"

"Yep, but I could use a hug," she tells me.

I stop the same gopher I did before for the chairs. "Hey kid, give Miss Vega a hug." The kid dropped the water bottles he was holding and started to shake. "Damn kid, breathe. Now go away." He started to get the water bottles and fell twice. "Leave them, and go away." I laughed as he ran off, tripping over his own feet.

"Jade that was mean," Tori said, a mock pout on her lips.

"I know, but it was fun," I said as I gave her a hug. Tori was tense against me, and the hug went on for a bit too long. But I could feel her tension draining away, and she actually went from stiff board to her old self in my arms. Of course, good moments never last.

"Yo, Jade. I could use a hug too," Bruce said with a big dopey grin on his face. I know he was just playing, but still…

"NO!" I yelled. I disentangled myself from Tori's arms and walked off set. Both Holly and David were shaking their heads as I walked back to my seat. "Places. Quiet on the set. Playback." Tori and Bruce gave us a wonderful performance. It almost brought tears to my eyes to watch them. I looked over to Beck and he had put his clipboard down watch these two work. We could tell that they wanted this to be an over the top great performance for Tori's parents. "Cut!" I called, and Beck and I walked out on to the set. "That was the best I have seen you two do since we started this thing. Bruce, you were on point 100%. I just couldn't believe I was seeing the same guy that just two weeks ago couldn't say his own name right. And now look at you. Keep this up, Bruce, and you'll be an A-lister yet. And Tori, from the days on stage at school to here, you are Hollywood," I say to them. Taking Tori into my arms, and without a second thought, I kissed her.

"Um…Jade…" Tori pulled out of the kiss. "Is that what you wanted to do?" she asked me while wringing her hands and biting her lower lip.

"Yep." And I kissed her again. To hell with decorum.

After a few more shots, we cut for the day, and Holly and David invited us all out to an early dinner. That was where we learned that when Mike, Scott, or I couldn't go to meetings with Tori, that Bruce would go with her. Bruce told us about his brother, and how his helping Tori was helping him heal over his loss.

We also found out that when Tori makes her come back tour, Cat was going to be touring with her new album. So she offered to team up with her and that prompted Scott to suggest that when the time came, he was also going on this tour. I was so happy that Tori was turning her life around, but part of me felt left behind. Cat and Scott were going to tour with Tori, Beck telling her that she should go out to New York to do Broadway. Andre jumping in with new album ideas. And both Holly and David, saying that it would be so great to see her getting her life back on track.

I can't say anything at all. I think Tori going back out on tour this soon is a rotten idea, and don't get me started on New York and how asinine that idea is. Then there is Andre. I look at him and the word pathetic comes to mind. I can't believe how he is trying to sell himself to her right now. He is doing everything short of whoring himself to her. Then there is Holly and David. I'm glad they want Tori's life back on track, but isn't part of that track supposed to have the kids in it? I know that I'm not a given, or something she has to hold on to forever, but her kids need their mom back.

I look across the table at Mike and Fran, shaking my head. I start to gather my things. I don't have any positive input, so it's best I just go. I dig in my pocket for some money and slide it to Mike, giving him and Fran both a light nod. I stood up and walked out of the restaurant without anyone beside Mike and Fran noticing that I was even gone.

After my little pity party, I came back in the restaurant, smiling. I tucked my cell into my pocket, making it look like I had just been on the phone. "So everything good with the sitter?" Fran asked me, giving me the cover story I needed. I felt a stab of warm gratitude for this woman. She knew that I was at the edge of just walking away. That I had been forgotten by everyone there, even by my wife. I'd had the key in the ignition to the car. One wrist flick, and I would have been gone. I'm not even sure why I came back. I sigh inwardly, then realize I should probably answer Fran's question.

"Yeah, all is good. This is my usual sitter's sister. She is older and I have never used her before." I let a slightly worried expression cross my face as I sat down. Everyone nodded as they turned back to their conversations. Oh yes, hook, line, and sinker. I may be a director now, but I will always be the best damn actress that walked the halls of Hollywood Arts.

"So what is next for you Tori, after the movie is done?" David asked with a smile.

"I want to get my life back in order. Starting with my wife and kids. Hell, dad, I have a son I never met." And then it happened. Her eyes opened wide and she turned to me as tears fell down her face. "Catherine, she must think I don't love her, and that she had done something wrong, when I did not to come back. Oh, Jade, she is so young. She just doesn't understand what I have done." I jumped up when Mike did. We both saw this coming on and now it has hit her like a ton of bricks. Tori felt a full measure of regret, and she looked like she wanted to find a way to get rid of that feeling. I saw Cat start to take the drinks around her and pass them to Beck. David and Beck took them to the bar. Mike and I guided Tori out to the parking lot for some fresh air. She needed to let these feelings happen and not look for a way out.

I toss a quick look around. Thankfully, no one stood out as paparazzi. I'd heard on the radio that one of the "famous for being famous" celebrities had gotten drunk and hit a school bus. Thankfully no one had been hurt, save the ridiculously overpriced car, and if I knew the paparazzi, they'd all be camped outside that airhead's home, squawking about the tragedy. Tori doesn't need this kind of fame right now.

"First off, do you need to leave?" I asked Tori as we got outside. "I can take you home right now." I watch her carefully, making sure she isn't going through any withdraws.

"No. I don't think they would understand that I just up and left." She started to walk around in a small circle. I looked at Mike, who was watching Tori very closely. His eyes met mine and he gave a tiny shrug.

"Fuck them. If they can't understand that sometimes you can't handle something, then fuck them. If there was a point in time in your life that you should be selfish, then now would be it. You have to look after number one here and get better. And if that means you have to duck out on a dinner, then so be it. And if they can't get that, then fuck them." I watched as Tori stopped her walking and stared at me.

"I don't think I have to go that far. Maybe just a few more minutes out here would work," she said, smiling at Mike and I.

"You know, I think there should be a thirteenth step. Name it Fuck Them. A person that has gone through years of this kind of abuse, and then trying to make amends for their life should not have to live up to everyone else's expectations, because most of the time they want that person to be the same person they were before the abuse started. Well, isn't that when the problems started, being that same old person? So why can't people just let the abuser change to what is better for them, not what is better for everyone else?" I said as I looked at the ground, knowing I was one of those people, until I learned the right way to look at things. "Tori can never be the same old happy go lucky Vega she was, because she was never happy. If she was happy then drugs would have never been more important than her life. No, Tori has to find who Tori is, not who we think she should be. I love you, baby, and I will be there for you. No matter if that is by your side or cheering you on from the sidelines. I will never give up." I looked over and everyone had somehow slipped out onto the sidewalk, standing where they could hear us.

"You have a whole cheer squad here for you, baby girl," Andre said as he opened his arms and Tori walked into them. After a brief hug, Tori stepped back, her hands still on Andre's shoulders.

"Yep, we may get mad at times, but we always have your back," Beck said. Tori stepped over to him and gave him a hug. She squeaked a little when he lifted her off her feet before setting her down and letting her go.

"And the rest of you, Jade can have. That one sleepover in high school was enough for me, but I still love you," Cat said and we all look at her with surprise. "What, I don't get a hug?" Cat said, and Tori laughed and obligingly gave the tiny redhead a hug.

"Damn puppet was right about their sleepovers," Andre muttered to Beck as Tori walked back over to me.

"Okay, bill is paid, so what do you say we go back to your house, Tori, and we can have a night cap? I bought some of that hot coco you all like so much, and I thought I would make you kids some, like the old days," Holly said, smiling.

"Hell yeah!" We all yelled before going to the cars. I give Mike a look and he nods. He knows that I need to talk, but I think I get it now. None of this is about me. I'm just along for the ride, and hope I get to be in the car when it's all over.

I met Tori and Fran as they walked up to the house. Everyone else was inside, waiting for them. I smiled at Fran as she walked into the house, leaving Tori out on the porch with me. "So Tor, are you happy?" I asked her as I pulled her into my arms.

She nodded as she pulled me closer. "Yes, I'm happy. Not only because you gave me back my parents and our friends, but you. You make me happy, and I promise that I will make everything up to you."

"No. I don't want you to worry about making the past up to me, I want you to worry about making yourself better. Everything will fall into line after that." I kiss her on her temple.

She shook her head and wiped a tear. "Jade, why are you still so good to me?" she asked, pulling out of the hug.

I took her hands and locked eyes with her. "I made a promise to you. I promised that I would love you, and to have and hold you, for better or worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish until death do we part. And I will move the Heaven and Earth to make sure that you get your happy ending. You have come this far on your own. Now it's time to let me take you the rest of the way." I leaned in and kissed with as much passion I could put into one kiss.

"Thank you," Tori said as she broke the kiss and smiled.

"Thank you?" I asked, raising my studded brow.

"Yes. Thank you for waiting for me at the end of this dark, cold tunnel," she said, kissing me again.

We had turned to walk in the house when I started to chuckle. "What?" she asked, stopping with her hand on the doorknob.

"I just thought you were remembering our first kiss, when you said thank you." She smiled and shook her head, leading me into the living room. "Or the first time I told you I love you, and you said thank you. Not 'I love you, too.' No, it was a thank you." Everyone was sitting in the living room talking when we came in. "You know what she said the first time we made love? That's right. Thank you. You know, you are a very polite person there, Mrs. West." I dodged her slap and sat down, taking her into my lap. I leaned into her ear and whispered, "You're welcome for all of it. And many more to come." Holly handed us our hot coco, and we all talked and laughed until late into the night. I know now that my Tori is back, and I can see that we will have our happy ending, just a little off course.


End file.
